I don’t have to tell how important and historic a day like today is. Far more talented people have and can say it more eloquently and in ways that will put me to shame. Whatever the results are of today’s election, people have gotten more involved. Whether it was due to losing their home to foreclosure, or the threat of losing their ability to call their loved one and life partner their spouse, people have used the last eight years as a catalyst to get up and do something; to speak up and speak out; to be heard, and counted on, and that is an awesome thing to see.
I’m not immune to the impact of change. I started this blog because I had a bunch of straight women friends going through the obstacle course of dating in Los Angeles, and similarly, so did I. I told them to shape up, or ship that fucker out. To not put up with bullshit, to be respected and to be respectful, and if it called for it, to get down right kinky. And in doing so, it was ok. You’re mom’s not going to find out about it, and if she does, who cares. How do you think you got here?
But then there’s that change thing. I’ve been going through it myself. I’ve talked about giving my life a remix and moving up to San Francisco. I’ve talked about way risqué encounters, about my compulsory and embarrassing masturbation habits, guys on TV I wanted to fuck the shit out of, and others in real life I wanted to fuck the shit out of me. Yet through it all, with good times and laughter and fun, and depression, and misery and dealing with a father who I was scared to death of coming out to, in the end all I wanted was love.
Who doesn’t? I romantically dream of cuddling in quilts on Sunday morning with the paper and a latte, and a soft-coated Wheaton terrier at my feet with the man of my dreams nuzzled up next to me, because I’m only human, and we’re social creatures, and these are the things that make up and define life for us.
And so the change continues. I’m aware of over-sharing on the internet, and I’m aware of the power of discussion. Starting this blog has been one of the best things I’ve ever done. I’ve met the coolest people, talked about the best topics, found myself intertwined and connected to the sites and social media networks I thought were strictly nerds only, and here I am a few short months from SXSW, constantly adding people to my Facebook, LOL’ing at people on Friendfeed, and busting out virtual neckrolls and bitchlips at people through my mobile Twitter. (Links are all over there on your left, people.)
Through it all, I’ve ventured on discovering me. The real me. Not my parent’s son. Not my brother’s little brother, not the boss’s go-to writer guy, but the Derrick who has just started to define himself by his own rules. Y’know, that whole change thing.
If this sounds like some kind of elegy, let me assure you it’s not. Well, not really. At my core, I’m still a perv who is into blindfolds and blowjobs, but there’s more to me than that. Shocking, I know.
Because we evolve, we ebb and flow, we move like liquid through a vessel, and through it all, we change.